Gurmeet Ram Rahim, the so-called Godman is in prison now for all the sins he did under the guise of his godly image. Ever since the first case was filed against him, many other shocking aspects of baba has been unfurling. The recent news about him is how he terrorized Twinkle Khanna for posting a quirky post about him.
The actress introduced Ram Rahim in her own funny style when Gurmeet Ram Rahim shifted in her neighborhood.
But the quack baba didn’t appreciate it and ordered her to keep her mouth shut. The actress is quite happy with con baba’s conviction so, wrote a blog against him and you should pay your eyes to it!
Here’s what Twinkle wrote,
When the Love Charger ran out of battery and why Kiku Sharda should start eating Chinese again https://t.co/qwL39U5SNu
— Twinkle Khanna (@mrsfunnybones) August 27, 2017
‘It all started when I saw the trailer of the first MSG film and being quite a horror movie buff, I was hooked.
I began asking people to join my MSG club and come with me to catch the first day, first show of the good Baba’s cinematic outing. I urged them to meet me at PVR Juhu wearing special T-shirts emblazoned with the good Baba’s face that you could buy online for Rs 375.
Since I am no godman, conman, or for that matter any sort of man at all, I got no applicants till finally, three of my friends decided to help me save face and joined the MSG club.
As a staunch member, I began writing letters to Maggi to put MSG (also known as monosodium glutamate) back into their noodles, despite my breaking into nasty hives upon ingesting the rather toxic substance.
I also regularly listened to his songs with lyrics like, ‘You are the Love Charger, billions battery when goes down you charged up with love so strong.’
Time passed and my dream of meeting my idol almost turned into a reality. One day, I was at the Marriott when I discovered that Dr Gurmeet Ram Rahim Singh Insan had taken over the presidential suite, as well as dozens of rooms for a fortnight. I guess he probably needed the extra space even if it was to just store his mammoth name.
My Parsi assistant rather spitefully refused to let me linger in the lobby waiting for a glimpse of my idol. But after I cursed her with ‘I hope vultures eat you alive soon!’ before realising that there weren’t any left to eat even the dead, she grudgingly let me take a picture with MSG’s lurid green convertible parked right outside.
A year later, while I was on my daily walk around the neighbourhood, and in the midst of arguing with people who were competing in what seemed like a long-distance betel juice spitting contest, I saw a convoy of cars and heavy police security. The Love Charger had moved into my neighbourhood. I feverishly posted about my new neighbour along with pictures of garlanded bottles of Chinese seasoning. Soon enough, his top aide got hold of my number and, politely, asked me to shut the hell up.
It’s not the first time I’ve been at the receiving end. I had once written a satirical column about a godwoman and her friends in high places called up my mother telling her that it would be safer for me to zip my lip.
I had also been made to feel like a gigantic dartboard when observing a few connections between two godmen — namely, their common grouse with the Nobel Prize, beards and yoga — I posted a satirical one-liner on Twitter that led to the enlightened folk threatening that they would make sure that millions of their followers boycott the man of the house’s next film.
But the realisation of what a godman’s followers are really capable of sunk in only on Friday after MSG was convicted of rape. Mayhem spread across parts of Punjab and Haryana as his followers, who call themselves Insan, forgot about their humanity and went about threatening to ‘wipe out India’. The violence led to at least 30 deaths and 250 people being injured. The ministers, who had taken blessings from the same godman looking at these very followers as a votebank, were busy announcing their helplessness to control the mob.
The ruling party’s Sakshi Maharaj, who once famously said, ‘We are ready to kill and get killed to protect our mother — cow,’ now seemed to want to protect another member of the animal species — rapists. He proclaimed, ‘One person has complained of rape against Ram Rahim. Crores others believe he is God. Who do you think is right?’
Babas and their kind are as common in India as potholes. But I think we are more to blame than them as they exist only because of us. As I wrote earlier, when our current idol falls off his pedestal, we simply call him or her a fraud and go off on a quest to find the next godman.
It is time that we gullible fools stop turning towards them like a bunch of silly sunflowers looking for the sun, forgetting that a halo is just a trick of the light.
There are times when I find myself pondering on pointless issues, like how much money these babas make off all their spiritual empires or how much time they must spend grooming their long hair, and equally long beards. First, they probably need to oil, shampoo and condition both, with products that they are selling to the public at large. Then, of course, there are the monthly hair and beard dye jobs, unless their god-like powers also prevent them from greying, though most are past the 50 mark.
But ultimately that is their business both literally and figuratively speaking, and I am fine with it. What really bothers me is how we cut open our skulls and hand them our minds on a plate like the legendary delicacy, monkey brains.
Anyway, all this monkey business reminds me of a certain cheeky monkey and old colleague, Kiku Sharda who was jailed for mimicking the Love Charger. I think he should immediately go to the nearest Chinese restaurant to celebrate, order a beer and tell the waiter, ‘I don’t want any monosodium glutamate in my Schezwan chicken, you people should lock away your MSG too. Cheers!’
A man who has done only shameful deeds throughout his life and has abated humanity should be sentenced to lifetime. 20 years in jail is a pity on him which he certainly doesn’t worth.